I know, I admit it. I’ve been neglecting my blog. I haven’t been reading your lovely posts, haven’t been posting anything. I’m sorry.
I got reasons to explain my absence though. Bear with me, please? I haven’t been in the best of my spirits lately. I haven’t lived up to my best image, I haven’t been the best version of myself. I haven’t been taking care of my health. I haven’t been a good friend, haven’t been a good daughter. Heck, I haven’t been a good person. This last month was wild, and I let myself down. That I failed to embrace positivity is an understatement. I, in fact, have been systematically shedding it from my life.
Err, that’s a lot of have-nots.
My grandfather had two heart attacks inside of 15 days and had to undergo an emergency heart surgery. I was mad because I couldn’t help him. A childhood friend lost her father. I was mad because I couldn’t make her feel better. I neglected my own health because I was too sad to exercise and eat healthy, no kidding. I got accepted into the Harvard Peek Program, but decided not to go for it. Then later I was mad at myself because I let go of such a brilliant opportunity. Ain’t I stupid?
I think I caused a rift between two friends, got yelled at for attempting damage control. So I was mad at myself for trying. I was so angry with myself that I refused to study. 3 weeks and I didn’t touch a book. I was so busy being sad, how could I make time for books?
Yes, I’ve had a mad, rough few days.
But it’s a bad phase, not a bad life.
They say bad times teach resilience. Well, it’s true.
Now I’m no Tibetan Monk. I don’t have sagely mantras to offer to you. But here are some lessons I’ve learnt. It’s something we all know—we just need a reminder from time to time.
Don’t be hard on yourself
Really, it’s no good. Stretching yourself too far will only break your spring. Instead, push yourself slowly. An inch at a time. It’ll take a while, but you’ll reach the terminus without breaking your back. And if not, then remember that you don’t have to excel at everything, okay? Mediocrity is not always bad. Find yourself a different path.
Timing is NOT everything
They teach you that opportunity knocks only once. That’s a big, fat lie (Tell me who’s spreading these lies, she needs a thrashing). If you let an opportunity pass you by, worry not. You have your whole life ahead of you, countless opportunities will knock at your door. You’re competent, you’re strong. You’ll net them. If life gave us only one chance we’d go to our graves as soon as we’re born.
Do NOT hate
Life’s too, too short to hate. Hatred will make your insides hollow, it’ll make you a bitter, jealous human. It’ll do you no good. Learn to love and forgive, learn to let go. You’ll be happier and merrier. Forgiving is not a sign of weakness. It’s a strength you must strive to posses.
There are things you can’t control
I struggle a lot with this one. There’s so much around us over which we have no control. You had plans for shopping but its 45 degrees outside? You’re mad but can you control the sun? No? Then get over it. Go shop another day. You can’t control weather, people, death or traffic. Put on a smile, be brave and let it go.
Grow and evolve
You’ll lose if you don’t evolve. Darwin’s Natural selection, ding ding! Let your heart, mind, soul grow and flourish. It’s hard to get out of your comfort zone and challenge yourself, but it’s worth every effort. A static mind will creep you and eat you alive. So let it blossom, let yourself blossom. Keep making advances, one at a time. Identify areas where you need to make changes and then work systematically to achieve your ideals. Expand your comfort zone.
Stop giving excuses
So you’re dissatisfied with your life? Who’s stopping you from making changes? You want to exercise more? Then exercise more. You want to eat healthy? Then do it. You want to go out more? Then go out more. Take charge now. It’s your life and only you can tract it! Push yourself to the edge and then make a leap. The wind will charge your body.
You’ll find peace
It may sound impossible right now. But if you show enough determination and resilience, you’ll soon clear the mess around you. You’ll disentangle one net at a time and slowly free yourself. It’ll take a week, a month, or a year— but you’ll find peace. Things may not make sense right now, but they’ll all fall into place. Do your part and then let life work its miracles.
Find reasons to be positive
It’s difficult when you’re stuck in a bad phase. But positivity is perhaps the only thing that’ll help you recover and build yourself again. You’re your person, never forget that. Things may be bad right now, but it will get better. It always does. So find that positive ray of light and keep it close to your heart. The dark clouds will make way for sunlight. Exude positivity and watch good things come to you.
Do NOT judge
This is a no-brainer. Everybody—your friends, your foes, your family, people on the streets—is fighting their own battles. You do not know which war they’re waging, what’s causing them to be mad and angry. Be patient, be accepting. They’re your people. Do not judge and make monsters out of people in your head. They’re as confused, sad, mad, angry & puzzled as you are.
Well that’s it for now. But as you might have guessed, this list is by no means exhaustive. Maybe you can add to it? Let’s see if we can make it more comprehensive! As for me, I hope I act over this wisdom and not come across as a hypocrite. Pardon me if I do, I’m only human!
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